“In clinical studies,” Dr, Lin told us, “researchers notice that sexual experience decreases anxiety levels.” There’s a good reason for this.
When you have sex, your brain gets a delicious cocktail of hormones and neurotransmitters, including oxytocin (the bonding hormone), dopamine (the feel-good hormone), and serotonin(the serenity hormone), among others. Your brain generously shares this heady concoction with the rest of your body, and it acts as a powerful mood-enhancer, increasing your sense of well-being and, ultimately, relaxing you.
In fact, according to Daniel Amen, M.D., the superstar neuroscientist who owns and operates the Amen Clinics, orgasm soothes the same part of the brain that is calmed by pharmaceutical antidepressants, which may be why depression is less common in people who have sex regularly. If you’re currently taking an antidepressant, be sure to let your doctor know if it’s interfering with your libido. This is a notorious side effect of some antidepressants, and if you’re experiencing it, your doctor will want to correct the problem.
Sex or meditation?
Women’s brains are designed for multi-tasking, which helps to explain why we can be thinking about the grocery list, that weird rattle in the car, or an argument with our daughter-in-law even when our man is trying to give us his best stuff. All this changes when we orgasm, however. As Dr. Komisaruk says, “Orgasm is a special case of consciousness,”an altered state where you’re feeling, not thinking, so to speak. And the best path to a great orgasm is to keep our head in the game; to practice what is known as mindfulness – clear your mind and focus on the sensations.
Having mindful sex isn’t just good for your relationship; it’s also good for your brain. Scientists now know that one of the areas of the brain most affected by orgasm is the same area that is affected by deep meditation, or the brain’s “religion center.”
More, more, more!
Given the amazing health benefits of sexual connection, it’s all the more alarming that Americans are having less sex than they have in the past, and much less than people in other countries. While more than 80% of us believe that sex is important for our health and well-being, only 48% are satisfied with our sex lives, according to a Sexual Wellbeing study conducted by Durex in 2013.
So how do we close the gap? The easy answer is to have more sex. In long-term relationships, dopamine levels can dip, meaning that sex is less exciting than it was when you first fell in love. But take heart! You can bring those dopamine levels up by trying new things together, and those things don’t have to be sexual. (Though they can be!) Visiting new places and trying new activities, like ballroom dancing or whitewater rafting, can increase your dopamine levels enough to make sex more exciting.
Want an even easier point of entry? The Durex study suggests that for most of us – male and female – massage tops the list of things that would improve our sexual satisfaction.