by Brigid Delaney: Brigid Delaney has been immersed in Stoicism since 2018 – and has had plenty of cause to use it since. Here’s a cheat sheet of what she learned…
It was fortuitous that I started getting interested in Stoicism around 2018 – because by the time the pandemic came around, I really needed it.
“Cometh the hour, cometh the woman!” I said, Epictetus’s Enchiridion in hand, as the borders shut in March 2020 and friends started to hit me up for Stoic advice. “Inject that Stoicism into my veins!” they would text.
Roman emperor and Stoic Marcus Aurelius once wrote: “No role is so well suited to philosophy as the one you happen to be in right now.”
It’s true. When life started changing rapidly – and fear was in the air – the ancient Greco-Roman philosophy proved to be a remarkably useful tool. Even if there had been no pandemic, Stoicism was saving my arse every day: from dealing with Fomo to the cost-of-living crisis; from missing out on a job, to the climate crisis, to heartbreak and loss. Everything had a template from the Stoics – or had at least been deeply considered by them. And much of their advice is as fresh today as it was in ancient times.
But where do you begin? And how can you apply it to your own day-to-day life?
1. Work out what’s in your control
A cornerstone of Stoicism is the “control test”, as found in the Enchiridion – and during the first waves of the pandemic the control test was invaluable for me. I still use it every day to make an assessment on what I should and shouldn’t worry about, and to see where I can take action and best direct my energy.
Epictetus – whose handbook was published in c.125 CE – wrote: “Within our power are opinion, motivation, desire, aversion, and, in a word, whatever is of our own doing; not within our power are our body, our property, reputation, office, and, in a word, whatever is not of our own doing.”
Essentially, our field of control consists of our own actions and reactions, our desires, our character and how we treat others. The rest – including our bodies, the actions of others, our reputation and our fortunes (personal and financial) – are out of our control.
Snap lockdown means you can’t go to work? Out of your control, but you can work on how you deal with it. Virus circulating in the community when there’s no vaccine? Out of your control, but your actions can help protect yourself and others. Stressed-out friend gets too drunk and takes her loneliness out on you? What she does is out of your control, but your reaction isn’t.
For every problem, there is a Stoic solution – and the control test is often the most elegant and simple way of finding our way to it.
2. You don’t need to judge everything
We make judgments quickly, often without adequate information – and sometimes when no judgment is needed at all. So much of what we label “good” or “bad” is actually neutral, but our judgments are powerful and dictate to a large extent how we respond.
I may apply for a rental that I really want and miss out – so I apply the judgment of “bad” to this. But is it still bad if, the following week, a better or cheaper place comes on the market?
If we treat most events in a neutral way we are less likely to get upset by things that happen.
3. Money, health and reputation are out of your control
As per the control test, money, health and reputation are all essentially outside our control. If we can cultivate indifference to them we are less likely to become upset and waste energy trying to control them.
Without any fault or action of your own, you could lose your reputation, then your job, then your money – then your house and maybe your marriage. You’ll almost certainly lose your looks as you age. If you live long enough, you might lose mobility, cognitive ability and other aspects of your health.
Accidents and illnesses happen all the time, too – also out of your control. You can be as careful as you like but it’s not completely up to you. You could get hit by a bus!
Stoics warned against suffering twice: that is, suffering from an illness or injury, and a second suffering which is the anger or anxiety that surrounds becoming sick or injured. It can happen to anyone, so there’s no reason why it should not happen to you – and anyway, death eventually comes for us all.
In order to avoid being too pained by these accruing losses, it’s better to practise indifference to what you have in the first place.
4. Practise the conditions that you fear
I’m making that sound easy, but how does it actually work? In order to become habituated to the suffering that awaits us all, the Stoics practised voluntary hardship.
Seneca advised his friend Lucilius to fast in case one day he was unable to access food: “Set aside a certain number of days, during which you shall be content with the scantiest and cheapest fare, with course and rough dress, saying to yourself the while: ‘Is this the condition that I feared?’”
Often it’s not as bad as we fear – and we are stronger than we think.
5. Practise imagining death
The Stoics believed you should grieve your loved ones while they are still living. In fact, they advised you to think of their death frequently while they are still alive in order to prepare.
