Awaken The World Through Enlightened Media

Quotes by Virginia Satir

June 21, 2022
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“All meaning is self-created.”
“We must not allow other people’s limited perceptions to define us.”
“As a therapist, I am a companion. I try to help people tune into their own wisdom.”
“We can learn something new anytime we believe we can.”
“The Problem is never the problem! It is only a symptom of something much deeper.”
“I want to love you without clutching, appreciate you without judging, join you without invading, invite you without demanding, leave you without guilt, criticize you without blaming, and help you without insulting. If I can have the same from you, then we can truly meet and enrich each other.”
“Put together all the existing families and you have society. It is as simple as that. Whatever kind of training took place in the individual family will be reflected in the kind of society that these families create.”
“We need 4 hugs a day for survival.
We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance.
We need 12 hugs a day for growth.”
“Two big questions present themselves to every parent in one form or another: “What kind of human being do I want my child to becom e?” and “How can I go about making that happen?”
“Our biggest problem as human beings is not knowing that we don’t know.”
“Family life is something like an iceberg: most people are aware of only about one-tenth of what is going on — the tenth that they can see and hear.”
“Over the years I have developed a picture of what a human being living humanely is like. She is a person who understand, values and develops her body, finding it beautiful and useful; a person who is real and is willing to take risks, to be creative, to manifest competence, to change when the situation calls for it, and to find ways to accommodate to what is new and different, keeping that part of the old that is still useful and discarding what is not.”
“Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible – the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.”
“Life is not the way it’s supposed to be, it’s the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference”
“It’s sad that children cannot know their parents when they were younger; when they were loving, courting, and being nice to one another. By the time children are old enough to observe, the romance has all too often faded or gone underground.”
“Problems are not the problem: coping is the problem.”
“So much is asked of parents, and so little is given.”
“Every word, facial expression, gesture, or action on the part of a parent gives the child some message about self-worth. It is sad that so many parents don’t realize what messages they are sending.”
“Hugging is good medicine. It transfers energy, and gives the person hugged an emotional boost. We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.”
“It is easy to see how adolescence becomes so frustrating, and old age so abhorrent, to many people. The life line is disempowered at two major points: at the beginning and at the end. The only acceptable place is in the middle. Power is conferred only on adults. It is denied to youth and seniors.”
“The symbol in Chinese for crisis is made up of two ideographs: one means danger, the other means opportunity. This symbol is a reminder that we can choose to turn a crisis into an opportunity or into a negative experience.”
“What lingers from the parent’s individual past, unresolved or incomplete, often becomes part of her or his irrational parenting.”
“Negotiating the adolescent stage is neither quick nor easy. . . . I have often said to parents, “If it isn’t illegal, immoral, or fattening, give it your blessing.” We do much better . . . if we find and support all the places we can appropriately say yes, and say only the no’s that really matter.”
“I regard (parenting) as the hardest, most complicated, anxiety-ridden, sweat-and-blood producing job in the world. Succeeding requires the ultimate in patience, common sense, commitment, humor, tact, love, wisdom, awareness, and knowledge. At the same time, it holds the possibility for the most rewarding, joyous experience of a lifetime, namely, that of being successful guides to a new and unique human being.”
“Taste everything, but swallow only what fits.”
“I feel that adolescence has served its purpose when a person arrives at adulthood with a strong sense of self-esteem, the ability to relate intimately, to communicate congruently, to take responsibility, and to take risks. The end of adolescence is the beginning of adulthood. What hasn’t been finished then will have to be finished later.”
“I believe the greatest gift I can conceive of having from anyone is to be seen, heard, understood and touched by them. The greatest gift I can give is to see, hear, understand and touch another person. When this is done, I feel contact has been made.”