by Jonathan Robinson: Whether you want to end a bad habit, lose weight, make more money, or find inner peace, you need to master the art of motivating yourself.
Although success in almost all areas of life is rooted in being able to stay motivated over a long period of time, most people don’t have any idea how to do that. They simply hope that their enthusiasm will stay at elevated levels, despite the dampening effects of time and difficulty. Fortunately, you can now depend on a powerful method to help re-ignite your motivation whenever you desire. I call it the Pain- Pleasure Description (PPD). Using one of the basic principles of human psychology, the PPD allows you to quickly tap into images and ideas that will inspire you towards your goals.
The PPD is really a method loosely based on the Charles Dickens’ story A Christmas Carol. If you remember, in that wonderful story three ghosts come to visit the mean, miserly man known as Scrooge. The first one to visit, the ghost of “Christmas past,” graphically shows Scrooge how his behavior has hurt himself and others in years gone by. Then, the ghost of the present pays him a visit, and he also shows Scrooge how his lack of generosity has caused pain to those who depend on him. Finally, the ghost of the future comes by, and he shows Scrooge that if he doesn’t change his behavior, he’ll soon be dead and everybody will be celebrating. When Scrooge realizes how much pain he has caused himself and others, he finally decides to change. In a similar way, when you read your Pain-Pleasure Description, it will also help you to change–or stay motivated to do what you need to do.
The basic instructions for the PPD is to simply write out an accounting of exactly how your unwanted behavior has caused you pain in the past, the present, and if you continue—the future. Then, you write a brief description of how much pleasure you will potentially receive from staying motivated and completing what you deem to be important. The more specific and graphic you can make your description, the more effective it will be in motivating you. To help you get a better idea of exactly what such an essay would look like, I’ve included a shortened form of one below for someone trying to quit smoking:
“In the past, I’ve had dates not want to kiss me once they realized I was a smoker. I’ve had to endure the humiliation and the cold of smoking a cigarette outside in the rain, while everyone else had a good time inside. In the last twenty years, I’ve spent over $35,000 on cigarettes and increased medical costs due to smoking. If I had not spent that money, I could have owned my own home by now. Currently, I’m finding I get sick a lot more than I used to, and my husband doesn’t enjoy kissing me anymore. Just trying to keep up with the kids makes me feel out of breath. I remember seeing how embarrassed Shelly was to introduce me to her friends because I had a cigarette in my mouth at the time. If I continue to smoke, I’m likely to die ten years earlier than I normally would (the national average). I can picture grandkids at my death-bed looking at me, tears rolling down their face, crying because their Grandma won’t get to see them grow up. Yet, by quitting cigarettes now I can save thousands of dollars, have more energy, have my entire family be super proud of me, and be able to romantically kiss my husband again. In addition, I’ll be able to see my grandkids grow up and enjoy guiding them towards adulthood.”
Although the above description is shorter than the one I would want you to write, it still creates some powerful images that can help inspire someone to stay motivated. The key is that you come up with pictures or memories that have maximal impact on you. By being clear about how your old behavior is causing you massive pain, and how a new course of action will bring you pleasure, you will automatically want to change. Among other things, I’ve used the PPD to help people off drugs, leave an abusive relationship, and even avoid eating sweets. Once you’ve written the whole thing out, you need only read it a few times a week to help keep you on track.
The most difficult thing about the PPD is taking the roughly twenty minutes to write out your list. Yet, once it’s done, it only takes a couple of minutes to read it whenever you need to be motivated. An alternative to writing it out is to dictate your description into a tape recorder. As with a written description, the more specific and graphic your words are, the more motivating it will tend to be. Then, you can listen to it on your Smartphone whenever you like. Once your PPD is done, feel free to add powerful new images as you think of them.
If you can dive into your mind and squarely face the consequences of not changing, you’ll find, like Scrooge did, that you suddenly want to change. People are biologically programmed to avoid pain (physical or emotional), and try to gain pleasure. The PPD is a quick way to link pain to your old, unwanted behavior, and pleasure to a new way of being. Once your brain is clear about how it can avoid pain, you’ll find that you’re automatically motivated to do the right thing.
Jonathan Robinson is a psychotherapist, best-selling author of 12 books, and a professional speaker from Northern California. Mr. Robinson has made numerous appearances on the Oprah show, as well as many other national TV talk shows, and articles about him have appeared in USA Today, Newsweek and The Los Angeles Times. For the past 30 years he has spoken to dozens of Fortune 500 companies including Google, Microsoft, Dell Computer, Coca-Cola, and Fed-Ex.
Jonathan has written several bestseller books including, “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Awakening Your Spirituality;” “The Experience of God,” “The Little Book of Big Questions;” and “Communication Miracles for Couples.” His latest book is called, “More Love, Less Conflict.” Jonathan also co-hosts the podcast “Awareness Explorers” with author Brian Tom O’Connor. This podcast focuses on revealing the easiest and most powerful practices for directly awakening to one’s true nature.
Through TV, live lectures and radio, Mr. Robinson has reached over 100 million people around the world. He is known for providing his audiences with immediately useful information presented in a fun and entertaining manner.
