by Donna Quesada: If you were to ask me, after sitting through all the various meditation retreats and spiritual training programs
My teacher, in the Kundalini Yoga tradition, used to say it is the most precious thing we have as a human being. But in those days, I must admit that it went a little bit over my head… in the sense that I wasn’t sure exactly what he meant by grace. Until one day it made sense. I guess we cannot really hear things, until we are ready.
He went as far as to say that the only difference between all of us is the degree of grace that we carry. In other words, it doesn’t matter if we are homeless on the street or if we are a big-shot CEO of some corporation. The degree of grace that we embody is what makes the difference in the way our lives ultimately unfold.
So what is grace, anyway? He used to call it a kind of innocence. Specifically, he said it is when we are“meditatively innocent.” Huh?
One day I came to realize what he meant, and I reflected on how some people end up jaded by life and others don’t. I saw that it is the presence of grace that keeps us from getting worn out and bitter. When we let ourselves become jaded, it is as if we are wearing a mask of disgust… We feel as though life has beaten us down. We define ourselves as “victims” of life‘s trials and challenges and it becomes a kind of shield that we wear around us and it hardens us.
Grace, as it hit me that one day, is the capacity (and the willingness) to stay soft, vulnerable and yes… innocent. And because there’s no shield around us in that state of innocence, the light gets in and then we are able to send it back out again.
Ultimately, I discovered that it is the presence of God within us. But that realization had to come through an experience, rather than a mental notion. In other words, I couldn’t conceive of the idea of of God within. It was just words, until I experienced the feeling of it. It is a safe feeling… I felt protected… loved.
And I found that in this place of love…when we receive love and relax into love… everything becomes love. It’s what you become. It’s what you begin to radiate. It becomes the only thing you can relate to… the only thing that makes sense. Judgments subside. The need to criticize just dissipates. Because God doesn’t criticize and you have become God… so you see as he/she does. You understand as he/she does. And there’s no room for doubt, with regard to anything… because you know you are protected. It’s absolute comfort and security. The internal angst simply vanishes, like water droplets under the sun.